Well. It’s all over. I went down for surgery at 8.15am yesterday, by 3pm today I had been discharged. 12 staples in the back of my head, a bit of a headache (but Tramodol helping) and a bit wobbly on my feet but otherwise no real problems. They said it was a straightfwd op, and they weren’t lying. Early feedback is they think they got the little bugger and it’s all looking really good. I’m stunned, and so happy I keep having a little cry. I know it could have been so much worse. They’re amazed at my recovery and quite frankly so am I. When I went in on Monday, they said I’d be in till at least Friday, possibly Saturday, so to be out the next day… I can hardly believe it myself. I’m SO proud of my little body. Just when my head thinks I can’t do this any more, my body rolls up its sleeves and gets the flip on with it. My surgeon was, predictably, fantastic. The anaesthetist got the drug combo just right – no sickness or weirdness. It really couldn’t have gone better (don’t jinx it now, Frankie!).
Clearly brain surgery is no walk in the park and I’ll need a close eye for the next few months but apparently the chance of a brain recurrence is about 20 per cent and there are LOTS of treatment options. I’ll take those odds, thank you. I don’t think I’ve ever been more scared in my life than I was yesterday walking down to that theatre, red pen and sticky dots all over my head, but it really wasn’t that bad. Having a mastectomy was worse. I really thought that if it got to your brain it was curtains, but it’s not necessarily the case. Yes I know the statistics but I’m not a statistic, I’m me. With a kickass medical team who have never given up on me, wonderful friends and family and of course, a man I adore who gives me something to live for every day. Annoyingly, I’ve now lost my licence for a year, maybe two, and I’ll be on anti-epilepsy meds probably indefinitely now but it’s a small price to pay really. I have an Oyster card, it’s no biggie.
So what next? A weekend of quiet cuddles with my boy, staples out Monday, Alison Wednesday where she hopefully gives the go ahead to get back on chemo. I don’t know what the future holds right now and to be honest, I’m not thinking too much about it. I know I am thankful for every prayer, every good vibe, people willing me on. I’m not ready to give up yet, far from it. I never thought I could ‘do’ brain surgery but I have. And now I feel like I can take on anything. Cancer, you sneaky little sod – you caught us all by surprise but I’ve won this little battle so UP YOURS. Try this again and we’re all ready for you next time.